i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
I'm hoping to finish this bottle of wine before I pass out, I don't want the remainder spilling on my white down comforter.
Either allow it in a formal toast or i will drunkenly tell your in-laws while i'm dancing on their table. either way, the truth is coming out
We've been here 3 hours and the only 1 word answer she didn't give was the drink order. Don't think I'm getting laid tonight
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
Thanks for the morning blowjob. Scientifically proven you can't have a bad day if it starts with a blowjob.
The staples of my diet are Labatt Blue, Xanax, and brick cheese.
I should have never moved out...
There was a slutty maid costume on the floor when I woke up, but the house was trashed. Either she's been fired or got promoted, I'm not sure which.
I mean. I just want to sit in my bed and eat bagels. What's wrong with that?
He sent me a dick pic from his living room and it has pictures of his three kids in the background
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
Never going back to jail again. Only time in my life I've ever had a wet dream about jerking it...
Randomize
