brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
am i at home because theres a dig starrrrring at me and i dont know wit plus i haer sirens. run fast.
haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
I'm a gentlemen, chivalry is what i do, i'll open the door, pull out your chair, buy your drinks, i'll even go down first, but when it comes to mario kart, i draw the line. I'm sorry but i just can't let you beat me at mario kart
she doesn't hate you. She just thinks you need a personality adjustment, speech therapy and weight watchers.
As soon as the judge read that I rear ended the car from getting roadhead he chuckled. You know he's been there before.
Im sitting alone watching titanic. Drunk. Without pants. Holding a fishing pole. Im pretty sure im okay with all of this.
Maid of honor is brides sister and single. Likes lemondrops. You're welcome.
The cop told you to put your hands behind your back and you slurred "I'm not falling for that again"
I have full custody of my vagina however you are granted visiting hours
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
I got a discount on the lube for giving the cashier focaccia bread from work.
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
She has a girlfriend too.. we decided that two cheats equal eachother out to zero. with our flawed grasp on algebra and the bottle of jack we were passing back and forth the logic seemed airtight.
Randomize
