Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
So... I'm really sorry I tried to sell you to random people in cars last night
at this point every shot is just a haymaker to my liver
The cab driver doesn't know where we can find an empire state building shaped dildo either!? What is wrong with NYC!?
The bar owner gave me permission to push people into the pool. I'm never going to leave Los Angeles
You need an intervention. You fell into traffic walking home.
Not really. Birthday weekend. Totally jusifiable. Besides I didn't get hit. No harm no foul.
I can't tell whether I'm a) still hungover from two nights ago, b) legitimately sick or c) all of the above... multiple choice was never my forte
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
She kept pulling joints out of her bra and asking strangers for birthday hugs.
i think smoking weed in a ladies bathroom on the beach with two dudes might be the shadiest thing ive done in a while
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
So they just told me that while I was being loaded into the ambulance the cop told them if they were good friends they'd post it on Facebook...
The subtweets were good enough
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
Just threw up in a baggy on the airplane. The guys next to me clapped and bought me a jack and coke.
Livin the dream
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