it tastes like there's a party in my mouth and everyone is throwing up
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
I need a new pic for your contact id. Because your boobs popping up when I'm having dinner with my grandma or, ya know, when kids have my phone isn't so good.
Everyone is speaking Spanish and this 300 hundred pound chick is talking about the time she got out of prison... Fuck this place
Also, yes, I look pretty rough. But my ovaries fought back this morning so getting dressed decently was not a priority.
Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
He played with my boobs the whole time we watched Scott Pilgrim and then started invited others to play with them too. It reminded me of how my mom gives out my french fries without asking.
Whenever someone tells me they've never met a bisexual, I feel like a majestic fucking unicorn.
I thought I was really making her scream. Turns out she had a Lego jammed in her lower back.
No one wants to start their day off with bloody lemons and a tampon in the toilet. Wtf.
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