her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
Ok I won't set anything on fire if you wear pants all night. This is a bet we're both destined to lose.
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
I think my uterus is still laying in your bed somewhere under the covers.
I heard an explosion in the backyard. You told me you were playing "will it burn".
I mean you can't really blame him. He's named after whiskey and I don't get along with pants.
I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
Bro, she said my penis was the best thing to happen to her mouth since teeth.
i took four shots of tequila, threw my fist up in the air, then went around the party showing everyone how to do the ninja turtle handshake. that's the last thing I remember
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
RICK BROUGHT THE HOT BARTENDER HOME. SOMEONE CALL THE FIRE DEPARTMENT, CUZ RICKYS ON FIIIIIIIRE.
lmao nvm she punched him in the face and left
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
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