Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
The amount of pregnancy tests I've taken in my life is unhealthy
Sorry for feeding you peanuts last night while you were sleeping, you looked hungry.
Nothing says Welcome to America than having the international house watch a sorority girl puke over the edge of the porch at 8am.
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
Please be advised that because of last year's "incident" we will no be starting St. Pat's day with spicy breakfast burritos and car bombs. Please plan accordingly.
Drink for every country you've never heard of.
Fuuuuuuuuuck
He told me the hickey on the side if his neck was actually a "bruise" from hitting a bird on his motorcycle. I'm not sure what's more impressive, the fact people believed him due to the size of the mark or the fact you gave it to him.
My sober self will be embarrassed tomorrow. For now I am laughing my ass off.
Is it bad form to spend company money and place an ad in the paper because I wanna nail the sales girl?
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
I let a 30 year old guitar player that works at a call center go down on me in his backseat last night
I wish I had a tail.
Why?
...why not?
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