I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
just woke up and he was jacking off in the corner.. am i being punked?
Here's my recipe for happiness. Go get a pen. 1. smoke a bowl 2. put on explosions in the sky 3. take a bath. Do this for about 1 hour or until all your problems go away.
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
So I cleaned out my gym bag. Found half a bottle of malibu.
You know, I could pretend I'm shocked but what's the use?
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
You sent me a picture of you licking the bottom of a shoe and the caption was "it tastes like shoe"
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
which one of you assholes put my new jeans down the garbage disposal?!
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
Let's be honest I'm gonna watch murder she wrote and eat taquitos at three am
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
Randomize
