She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
I just had to download an app to edit pictures on my new phone. The things I do for sexting...
There is a mirror in the headboard of the bed that I'm sleeping in so I can immediately question life choices when I wake up.
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
Think of where it's been though. That Dr. Suess book, "Oh the Places You'll go" was written for his penis.
Can I steal her, take her home, and feed her only vodka?
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
I think I'm getting sponsored by the Mexican Drug Cartel for the start of my poker career. It was an interesting night at the bar. One word, Vegas.
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
Am i obligated to tell my sister her girlfriend was my one night stand three months ago?
they are cutting me off...little do they know I am making a 75 yr old man i named Herbert buy me drinks now...no shame at 11 am...
Randomize
