yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
the room spins SO much faster in panama
Hey since its national brother week is that eiffel tower option with your girlfriend still on the table?
i woke up to banging and pieces of ceiling falling on my face
No worries. It'll grow back. I mean, hey, my eyebrows grew back after he shaved them off. So it's all good.
Today I'm judging my level of singleness on a scale of one to eat-a-can-of-frosting. It's not looking good for me.
Ooooh. Get funfetti
I wanna get freshman fucked up and do shady things on the last Friday of my youth.
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
I no longer exist. I have transformed into a puddle of sex.
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
I mean, you have to swipe right on someone you had sex with last week though, right?
I mean his penis was perfect in pictures but its even more perfect inside me
Drunk me made cabbage burritos at 1am after going to hustler hollywood.\nI bought socks. Lol
Randomize
