Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
either we just had an earthquake or I am really good @ masturbating
Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
She STILL went home with me even when I said yes when she asked if I had an infectious disease. Turns out she asked if I had an infectious spirit...well she has my infectious spirit now
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
casually drinking alone with your cats. do they like sparks?
Cause I came home. Im covered in green marker and jack daniels. Theres a taco and the words "we went to Mexico" on my wrist. Im a walking abomination.
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
It was a blind-side dick pic.
I don't even remember what dignity looks like anymore. I JUST WANTED TO ROAST SOME POTATOES
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