the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
And a psychic told me I was pregnant and I am just so over life right now.
I'll just save you what dignity you have left by letting what happened die with your lack of memory and/or liver.
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
she fell asleep in a torn bush after playing cards at a nursing home.
Shower wine is way better than shower beer.
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
Sitting naked in my bed eating leftover Mexican food drinking coors light.. Can it get any more single than this?
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
1 why did you tell them where i peed last night and 2 where the fuck are you
No my problem is I'm working and its a beautiful Saturday. I should be recovering from a hangover and out golfing. Fuck responsibility. I miss college.
Apparently I’m a terrible influence when alcohol is involved
Randomize
