Too tired to do the dishes so I made mac and cheese in a teapot. There's still some left if you want some...
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
He started to notice that i sleep with every girl he calls dibs on.
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
all law school has taught me so far is how to fart quietly during lectures and how to out-argue the ice cream guy when he screws me out of extra toppings.
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
Hey girl, do you remember you made me brush your hair with a plastic fork on Saturday night?
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
Do you think it would be okay if i cleaned my cartilage piercing with the leftover vodka?
Randomize