btw ... thanks for not giving me up as the craigslist killer
i owe you one
thanks for snagging those panties for me
maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
I am so horny I keep driving over the rumble strips... best half hour ever.
The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
I'm wayyy too drunk to be in a parade right now
for breakfast I had vodka and flavor blasted goldfish. and I'm topless.
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
You crawled everywhere and rolled in ice cream. No more vodka for a month.
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
at crossfit today a guy shit his pants while deadlifting 405 lbs. coach made fun of him then congratulated him on his new personal record.
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
Randomize