i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
Its about making memories worth repressing
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
You were yelling at the bowl of salad and telling it to quit taunting you and telling you to go to tacobell
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
Take my keys. Load me into the vehicle. Drive. Get food. Come back. These are my demands.
Judge me...This apron fits PERFECTLY when I have no clothes on
Who said I was judging? More like congratulating.
How did you get a free t-shirt at the strip club?
I was attacked by whores
You threw up on yourself again didn't you?
They were strong whores
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
I'm not gonna lie. The only reason I haven't drank a whole bottle of crown tonight is because we only had 3/4 of a bottle left.
Didn't want to waste the cheese dust from the white cheddar popcorn, so I gave him a handjob, followed by the most delicious blowjob ever. Win-win.
How high were you when you left that message, cause you made honest-to-God, credible seal noises.
I am so so sorry I bit your butt last night. Twice.
Randomize
