Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
So I thought I was slick leaving his room this morning all incognito. Little did I know I was wearing his football jersey with his name across the back... stilettos & my bra was left behind. never seeing that again
just landed in detroit. Currently holding a bag of my own vomit. neighbor told me it was the most graceful vom she has ever seen. Kicking off bar exam week in style.
i just did my hair and make up to walk our dogs.. I hate being the single roommate
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
Off topic, but is it sad that Matthew and I are calculating how much sex we need to have in order to work off a taco bell burrito?
You have to figure out where to put this turtle dude
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
That amount of times your family has seen my boobs is getting ridiculous.
Took it for the first time last night, and i saw a giant pillsbury boy coming after me with a wrench in his hand.
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
Randomize
