I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
cynthia nixon should never get laid more than me
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
So she comes up to me at the end of the night and asks me if I going to take her home and fuck her. I pretty much had to right?
you had an obligation.
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
Either this is the best sandwich I've ever had, or my stomach is just relieved to have something in it that's not Red Bull or semen.
Drunk in my research methods class at 9:30 in the morning. We should do a quantitative analysis of my mimosa consumption.
I am both scared and jealous.
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
She's like the Oprah of therapy. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. WITH A PADDED ROOOOM
There's like a dolphin trainer convention here or something. I will parlay this trip to Vegas into riding Shamu if its the last thing I do.
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
I broke my foot jumping out of YOUR window under YOUR watch. You failed me drunk guardian. You failed.
Randomize
