my facebook friend requests are always from girls of boyfriends i have fucked, facebook is the worst reminder of shame
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
Apparently I promised a worker at La Siesta free English lessons to make up for vomming all over the little Mariachi band.
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
just got tipped $5 to put a barbie in a waffle cone and drip caramel sauce on it while a group of dudes cheered and one took pics. 90% sure they were sober
If you listen closely you can hear the sound of inbreeding and shame.
Now that I'm hitting my bong, I realized I haven't missed something so much in a long time. I love Thomas the Dank Engine.
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
I was drunk and gave him my dad's phone number instead because somehow I thought that'd be funny. Man did that fucking backfire
Sorry about the Christmas balls dude. At the time I thought they were festive as fk but I see now I've just spent too much time on the internet
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
how do you know everyone's mad at you?
I just woke up feeling shameful
Fuck my life... Im so horny Im gonna take it out on this sandwich
don’t ask me. i snorted coke off of a pregnancy test box last night. i obviously don’t make the best life choices.
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