We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
and she was petting her beer can
Hemmingway ran to paris to avoid going to the university of illinois and becoming a doctor. It was there he developed a drinking problem. I need a plane ticket.
People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
Good to know: if a hot girls asks to go back to my place, she probably just needs to vomit all over my bathroom
What was your penis's nickname in high school? Also, what was it's theme song?
i was way too optimistic last night... got back to my apartment and the porch light was still on, like i'd actually make it all the way home.
all i remember is him tryin to explain to the girls how to effectively hit the strip club with their bfs
hes actually pretty persuasive when he drinks
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
He shampooed and conditioned his pubes but can't manscape for shit.
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
I googled my name and pictures of you drinking showed up. Way to steal my thunder....
I have vodka, fruit gushers, and health insurance. Let's party.
Randomize
