Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
omg. why did you never tell me how amazing shitting and smoking is?
i thought this knowledge was automatically promulgated at the age of eighteen?
remember when mike pissed in his pants and then put a double cheeburger in the pocketsss of said wet pants for "safe keeping"? yea drunker then that.
My 8 year old wants to name our new cat "fur burger". how do i explain that this is not really appropriate?
why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
Just gave a gay guy pointers on how to make anal not hurt. Reevaluation of life choices: in progress.
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
i may or may not be making depth charges with cough syrup. i'll call you if i survive.
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
The fact that I am laying in bed on my stomach with an ice pack on my rump is a clear indication that I am no longer in my carefree 20s
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
I dare you to find another dealer that delivers bud to your home along with deep fried vegan burritos
I JUST WANTED TO GET SOME MOTHER FUCKING TACOS I AM SINGLE AS FUCK TACOS BRING PREOPLE TOGETHER OKAY
Someone sitting next to me at this football game is totally eating chicken nuggets out of his pocket and drinking four loko. I wanna be him.
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