would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
i decided to cut a 3rd hole in to my snuggie so i could masturbate all the time.. all time low? or genius?
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
Woke up chewing my pillow from a dream where I was scarfing Cajun pasta from TGI Friday's. That's a new level of fat, even for us
the only consolation to the fact that i puked in public today was that i did it down a storm drain... so at least i am a responsible public puker
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
I remember fighting the chubby dude and the bouncer put me in the full Nelson. Woke up this morning with a dislocated shoulder. We need to finish the rest of this beer though
they wouldnt let me drive the convertible because i was in a bird suit :(
Apparently she broke up w/ her bf like 3 weeks ago. She actually called me to be her bday hookup cause she's single now. Patience- the virtue that occasionally pays off.
You know the party's good when you say "Never have I ever caused an emergency landing" and someone drinks
He fucked me while wearing his night time breathing machine mask. Does this mean I joined the dark side and he is Darth Vader?
Was it a bad idea to have spent all of my tax return on coke?
I couldn't find my contact solution so I thought mixing toothpaste and water would work
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