It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
Package from mother. Contents: Cookies, my old pokemon cards, and condoms. Note: "These have a July 2010 expiration date so give them away or use them with a gal that would be a great daughter in law. Love Mom" Love you too momma
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
You would not believe how incredibly hard it is to climb on top of a three story apartment buildings roof from the air conditioning unit
somedays, I wish the drugs you give me would convince me they were a bad idea preingestion.
where's the fun in that?
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
The shit show didn't end. it just relocated itself to my apartment instead of yours.
you also need to get my treadmill fixed.
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
Also, nothing screams "don't talk to me because I'm unstable" like walking around eating cookie dough out of the package.
Get my husband this drunk again I will rip off your balls off with my bare hands and then cut them up with a dirty axe like fish bits. Do you understand me? DO YOU UNDERSTAND ME?! See you at breakfast, FUCK FACE. I'll shove that bottle of Jamison so far up your ass you'll still be praying in 2020 you can take a shit! Seriously, you make it hard to be your best friend.
I couldn't find any flowers so I brought her a cat.
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
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