Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
My Hamptons summer hookup resume reads like a walk-in clinic waiting list.
im sober playing flip cup. its like cheating.
Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
Literally passed out while tubing... Boating while hammered is a blast but thank God for life jackets
i actually have a tan line from him holding my boob while we were sunbathing
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
Dude she's from Moscow. I feel like I'm cheating on America.
You've changed since you got that strap on
His Australian accent during sex made me think I was in an Outback Steakhouse commercial
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
Randomize
