..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
Remember when we were trying to guess how many people could fit in my shower? The answer is 7
oh hey just found a glowstick in my tits. fuck yes new years eve
Note to self: Don't teach the naked lap rule in beer pong until after youve made a cup..
I fell asleep to the sounds of them banging in the next room. It was oddly soothing...
He's having a heart to heart coversation with the keg about what he should do with his life.
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
You know you're at a low point when you're sucking vodka out if your hair.
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
That is NOT what pussyfooting around means. Try that again with your toe and I break it off.
So I just got drugs from a house with a giant cross on it. Thank you, Jesus.
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
I was so hungover at work I had my shirt on backwards. I had no idea how I managed to get through today puke free.
You know shit got weird when you watched another guy shove drugs up your wife's ass and it wasn't awkward for any of us....
Randomize
