i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
You tried to wear your Jesus costume into Family Christian stores and say it was a book signing.
Our drug dealer just got busted, wear black tmrw
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
She can drink whiskey without a chaser and has a fridge full of whipped cream. Girlfriend potential
For gods sake, I only took one. With two nyquils. What a happy world its been today. Fulfill your obligations and then its marvelouso.
You kept me hostage in your driveway until you got your point across that alaska has warm weather
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
THE VODKA TRAIN IS NOW PULLING INTO THE STATION
Today, my weed came in a pokéball. I officially love my dealer.
All boys are excommunicated from my vagina until further notice.
MY COWORKER IS ATTRACTIVE AND I DROPPED A SONIC THE HEDGEHOG JOKE IN CONVERSATION I FUCKED UP
Update: my mom just told someone to shut up and suck her dick
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