Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(703): View more from Virginia

i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?

(1-703): View more from Virginia

yes

(703): View more from Virginia

... don't judge me

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(918): View more from Oklahoma

the fair has chocolate covered bacon...impossible is nothing.

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(731): View more from Tennessee

We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country?

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(709): View more from Newfndlnd, Labradr

the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.

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(803): View more from South Carolina

Somehow I managed to make my Dunkin Donuts uniform look slutty. And I'm not even wearing hoops.

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(734): View more from Michigan

I feel like I was just dunked in a tub of beer and then thrown in a giant dryer with rocks in it.

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(716): View more from New York

I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean

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(425): View more from Washington

The Mole People would help. They are a kind, helpful people, the Mole People are.

(541): View more from Oregon

Mole people?

(425): View more from Washington

Mole people

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(254): View more from Texas

I'll text you tomorrow when I'm not in someone's torture cave if I don't by noon call for help.

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