My sheets at my parents place are clean. No braveheart but I can paint myself, yell "freedom", and sword fight you with my cock. So come over.
I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer...
I queefed so loud it echoed.
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
Everything in my purse is 100% saturated in red wine, which made it challenging to cover up my booze breath with franzia soaked gum
At 27 it's no longer called 'slutty', it's called having a healthy sex life...
im just laying in bed, eating, getting fat, enjoying eating and getting fat, thinking about how i will probably have to get a fat boyfriend.
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
i told them you weren't like that.. and they laughed at me?
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
You ran up a $300 bar bill on his card and he didn't have you arrested, be grateful and move on.
The bar brought brought it upon themselves, they played billy joels piano man before closing, it's not our fault the bar isn't a bar anymore, right?
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
Randomize
