That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
Now I have to picture Dave Letterman having sex with all these women. Im the real victim.
I just ordered a 3 square foot pizza. This is how to beat an eating disorder.
This guy in church just had a prayer request to help him get through his hangover. He is my new hero.
I was tied up in bed before noon, the rest of the day can go to hell.
its before 9am and ive already had to dip my dick and balls in a glass of milk. probably isnt a good sign for how today is going to go.
I have a physical this friday. On a scale from 1-10, 10 being the most judgemental gay bashing, how much judgement am I gonna get from my dr when he checks my balls and sees the cherry tattoo
A man just sang Jennifer Lopez to me out his car window. I am not sure how I feel about this, but it is not positively.
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
The hardest part about being a child of divorce is when you're at your dad's house but your condoms are at your mom's house.
Leave it to me and my dad to puke on the same guy at the same bar 25 years apart
I might need to come puke in your toliet on the way home
You should of known that i was high if i refer to myself as melting into anything
Pretty sure he proposed because my house is awesome. His ass is a ten and he's offering to pay more than half the bills... How expensive is a divorce really? I mean I could probably put up with him for three or four years but a lifetime is a big ask.
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