WIFE SWAP. FAMILY OF MIDGETS. LIFETIME. NOW.
he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
Dude, I need a lifestyle change. I'm to old to be making out with chicks in foam parties, letting older chicks get all excited because I let them put their hands up my shirt, and running around doing scavenger hunts with 18 yr old chicks.
Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
Who suggested the eggnog wet t-shirt contest last night like whose idea was that
Speaking
I keep getting the feeling him and his friends are hilarious and we should drink whiskey together forever
Apparently I blamed my BAC on the Saint Louis Cardinals...how is that not a valid excuse?!
My walk of shame turned into having to get his dad to tow my best friends car out of the snowbank in his driveway
Pretty sure keeping my vibrator in the same drawer with the weed makes it work better. I fall asleep almost immedi
Talk all the shit you want but I slept in a oversized monster truck tire last night.
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