wakey wakey hands off snakey
how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
I'm doing a half mile walk of shame carrying a trash bag and still very drunk. Save me. I feel like a refugee.
please stop telling ppl youre Alice Cullen when youre drunk
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
He said he loved me so I pretended not to hear it because I don't think "I love your penis" was the response he was looking for.
i just keep picturing us drunk surrounded by kittens.
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
My underwear said "hard to get" on the butt. He laughed when he took them off.
You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
I used your vibrator when you were out of town. Now I know why you always come out of your room smiling.
Randomize
