You wanted to speak to the manager of mcdonalds as to why a "bag of cheeseburgers" isn't a menu option.
me and this guy in my office just exchanged an "i saw you at a drag show last night" look as he passed by my desk.
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
im gonna make a bucket list just so i can cross off "underwater blowjob"
then he compared my vagina to a dishwasher. A DISHWASHER?!
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
I feel like just to watch it, I need to be high. To understand it, I'd need enough drugs to kill an elephant.
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
The end of the friendship was inevitable. I hooked up with her cousin and forgot to mention it to her
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
The strippers who live across the street set up a decently professional stage on their front balcony and a banner for a go fund me... I think we're gonna get a show.
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