Dude, you really need to stop hitting on girls by telling them you sang a cappella in college.
i watch way too much csi for them to even pretend to be my friend.
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
I was just lying down, dumping goldfish into my mouth and they like all came out I thought I was going to choke and die and people would be like damn that's so sad, she died laying in bed stuffing her face and reading kanye wests twitter, damn.
I think my AA sponsor just booty called me.
My mom just looked at me and said; "You've been pretty bitchy lately do you need some dick?" WTF has happened to me?
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
i believe in u and ur pee
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
I purposely left my thong and accidentally left my ethics book, hairspray and most of my dignity.
The expiration date on my 40 is the same day as my 21st birthday
Do you ever look at your life and go "i'm too sober for this bullshit"?
Every day of my life.
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