when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
Is King's over? Or do I still have to say 'On Matt's cock' at the end of every sentence on matt's cock?
i need to buy one of the child leashes to wear at mardi gras or else im never making it out alive
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
You were so high you insisted on spoon feeding me your KFC bowl while I was driving.
Was who let the dogs out playing?
Ya. You started barking when it ended
My public calorie counter app is pretty much just a cry for help.
The bad news is tonight is also a blue moon, ergo, latin, I will have to get 'once in a blue moon' drunk which I feel is significantly more dangerous than IPO drunk
Omg my butt feels so much better. Those suppositories are magic. It feels like Jesus fingered me in my sleep.
If I get laid tonight it will 1.) Prove that the sex gods do in fact exist, and 2.) Show that I am one motherfucking badass bitch.
Hella random but just hear me out...A bar that is a petting zoo. Bitches love petting zoos.
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
Evidently I placed three booty calls at the same time...it was an ugly scene. I'm never getting that high again.
*jedi mind trick* you want to go down on me
His nipple licking is glorious
Randomize
