You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
It's not true, it's not true! She's too full of cheese to have sexy time!
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
Thanks for stealing lime trees for me at 4:00 am. We're well on our way to having sustainable supplies for mojitos this summer.
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
Bro I can't jerk it to my phone anymore. I feel Siri staring back, and she's real disappointed.
There was a pumpkin carving contest and we carved a very realistic dick about to penetrate a vagina. Our Christian Youth hosts were not happy.
I was woke up by the fucking Star Spangled Banner this morning. I sat up in bed and put my hand over my naked heart. I was so confused
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
I miss using glorious as an adjective. I'm gonna start doing that again. And I'm gonna try to get cuntatrosphe in there some more, too.
Look, if a guy shows up at your house. He's short, name is Logan, has weird vertical hair, let him in, give him food, and a place to stay. He's on a ver important mission. And I am he. as he is me and we are all together. And we are the eggman, goo goo gajoob.
What's the polite way to tell someone she's a grown ass woman and she needs to start acting like it.
Like did he really think I just hit him up for dick !? It's 11:30 am , these ain't hoe hours
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
Randomize
