Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
whenever music plays i find myself always doing kegels to the beat. its like the new foot-tapping
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
I'm riding in a wheelchair, being pulled by a golf cart. You need to be here.
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
I think that the jello shots in bowls is where it all went wrong.
He straight up just had me drive all the way here and when I got here he was drinking a cup of tea and right after said he needed to go to bed
Returning my drunken purchases from last night. Not a single thing I bought was on sale.
I think I reached some stage of aging, have a sore/injured shoulder from sex, next up carpal tunnel from sexting.
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
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