Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
I was going to clean my house but wine sounded better
Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
for future reference: anal bleach BEFORE boozing
she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
I wish that one Sunday morning I could wake up feeling like I have my life together.
There is a mirror in the headboard of the bed that I'm sleeping in so I can immediately question life choices when I wake up.
if you just come over, i will entertain you
arguing about the color of your bong does not count as entertainment
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
Her dog trainer Fuck buddy is over here again. She sounds like a squeaky toy and he talks to her like he talks to the dog. I CAN HEAR EVERYTHING!!!
I just chugged whiskey at 7 AM because going to breakfasts at Brendas doesnt seem right if Im not real drunk. I feel like when Brenda takes my order she can tell Im drunk and will take care of me.
I jus want to remember tomorrow how proud I was tonight for wearing my rainbow leggings as a long sleeved shrug I feel like fucking MacGuyver
FUCK YOU IM DRINKING WINE FROM A BOX
You okay there or need a ride? Maybe a straw for your box
Maybe a straw...
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