Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
So I was throwing up in this fancy toilet at a party last night, when he decided it would be funny to flush it. It was a beday. I had to walk out with toilet water and regurgitated rumpleminze all over my face and shirt.
on the way home the dog started throwing up her bone in the car..so naturally i started to puke too
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
Having a dry hump session to Alvin and the chipmunks surprisingly didn't kill the mood. He's that good.
I have a weapon and I'm not blacked out. Good as gold
The 78 year old woman who works next to me divorced her ex husband, remarried her first husband, and retired all in one day. I'd say it makes your breakup on Valentine's day pretty insignificant.
I hate you so much right now. You got us kicked out of my favorite bar because your drunk ass was hogging the Bluetooth jukebox and would play NOTHING but that goddamn skeleton song. IT'S NOT EVEN OCTOBER YET.
Spopky scrzy skeletonssz
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
It's 90 percent alcohol, and 10 percent a whisper that says "get drunk"
Randomize
