in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
so Mike and I made a deal. we'd do anal if he would help me pick out carpet tomorrow.
What...you let him do that?
It wasnt that bad. the two minutes it took is nothing compared to the 10 hr day I have planned for him tomorrow
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
when i first looked at you, you weren't wearing any pants. but then i realized you had them around your neck as a cape.
He made me sneak beer in the diaper bag... guess who is winning 2012 parents of the year
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
Found my underwear in a solo cup. That about sums up this weekend.
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
Today's walk of shame includes last nights hair and make up, an 8 hour shift, me leading a meeting and me throwing up in a parking lot on my way to work. Dear world, you're welcome.
I want to be tan and drunk. Is that too much to ask for?
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
hey. this is your former cousin. you boned my best friend last night.
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
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