I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
I don't think the TSA agent thought getting iced while searching my bag was as funny as I did.
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
We FINALLY fucked. I swear that's the longest I've ever held out for
Umm you met him three days ago....
I said what I said
APPARENTLY giving your friend one of your shoes so that you avoid the no shoes no service rule makes you drunk...
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
No, she isn't nearly as crazy as the girl who wanted to wear a vial of my semen as a necklace.
i woke up in his neighbors pool house. Not sure how I got here but there is people swimming outside. how do I escape?
just fucking run.
Everything was cool until I tried to photo bomb those Hells Angels, then it's all a blank
About to be a 4Loko vomit fountain in 45 seconds, what color will it be? Animated birds will fly out of me.
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
I can't believe we really went to walgreens to use their cork opener, bounced and drank a bottle of wine in a sketchy corner...
As I was about to fuck him, he requested a moment of silence for Leonard Nimoy.
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