But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
Is she bent over a couch yet or did daylight savings time throw off her usual schedule?
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
I literally paid him in shots to clean my entire apartment. he even vacuumed...who said alcoholism is a bad thing??
I found a tip from a dart in my bra this morning
He rode a broom down the stairs while we were mattress surfing. Naked. Buck ass naked. WTF
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
I've never seen a guy eye-fuck someone so hard in my entire life. I thought he would develop laser vision, bore holes into your body, and not even realize your innards would be spilling everywhere. That's how bad it was.
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
I just handed a girl a slice of pizza and she handed me her number. Is this how Vegas hookups normally begin?
I woke up uncovered, spread eagled to my dad saying "you really need to stop sleeping naked."
went to class still drunk this morning and my professor made the class give me a round of applause and said, "see people, THIS is inspirational... if she can make it to class in this condition there is no excuse not to show up!"
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