So there are ramen noodles in the shower you need to explain...
Blowing lines off from the book where the wild things are... bad babysitter?
Just snuck alcohol into the hospital for my mom.
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
Tinkerbell just flew up to me and tickled my balls. What the fuck did we smoke?
How did it go last night?
Woke up head half shaved and a burrito? So good and bad?
You emptied out your taco and asked the lady for a refill...and then you continued to carry out a full conversation SCREAMING
Apparently it is impossible to get kicked out of taco bell....I'll try harder next time
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
It is clearly not my fault that you decided studying was more important than trying to bang our hot teacher for an A, so I seized the opportunity.
OK BUT WHO THE FUCK FORGTS A LIVE CHICKEN IN MY HOUSE
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
Randomize