why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
Just saw a cougar do the walk of shame. She asked housekeeping where the fastest elevator was.
I have so much boob sweat I could bathe a baby
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
In complete seriousness I think I am the highest person on earth
We need to get you laid. Or i fear you might explode like a firework of sexual innuendos and unfulfilled erotic fantasies.
Unless you can blow me and bake me a pie at the same time, im not impressed.
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
He jizzed all over my ID badge. HR is gonna be pissed...
Jessica just ate her lipstick. That's how the night is going
I think we have some hyper-understanding of each other when drunk, because looking back at our text convo from last night, they were literally just jumbled letters.
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
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