no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
You made me cry and you don't even care
Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
i just realized i've been trying to levitate the potatoe chip out of her hand for the past ten minutes. i think i smoked to much.
Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
I pretty much gave up on you when you told me you couldn't go home yet b/c you had to stop at church first. It was 2 AM and you insisted you were late for mass.
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
I'm taking it from the chunk of pizza I just pulled out my hair that we ate pizza last night?
Just orgasmed in traffic. Starting to have feelings for my commute.
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
Just had that moment when you realize the two drunk women shoving all their money down your clothes were your middle school teachers...
There's no winning that game with me. It's either "Can I walk home at the end of the night," or "am I throwing up trying to sleep in the front yard." Rules are irrelevant.
I think we have it figured out.. She's my wife when she's here and gives me advise on how to get ass when she's 1500 miles away.
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
Randomize