if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
You act like I'm friends with her or something. I only screw her boyfriend!
Oh yeah.
I was literally just a half conscious dildo.
I feel like a really awesome person when i have to check my roof for things i've lost
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
As far as figuring life out your talking to a guy that's alternating text messages between his baby mama and a drunk bitch I met tailgating. My best advice is don't worry about shit out of your control and always and I really mean ALWAYS wear a condom.
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
We're gona eat taco bell and then take exlax and see who can hold it in the longest. Loser has to pay for drinks all weekend. You in?
There's nothing worse than carrying your fairy crown and wings home wearing fishnets
You're cock blocking me from my own boyfriend. What kind of shit is that?
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
I would rather you cheat on me then you watch this season of Breaking Bad without me.
Then she looked me straight in the eyes and asked me if I missed my foreskin. Weirdest conversation ever.
I just gate-crahed a party and met a state senator, so I had an interesting afternoon jog.
Randomize
