Alcohol only hurts me because he loves me.
We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
dude i woke up in a pile of chocolate chips. this has to stop happening
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
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This is sufficient.
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
We drove around last night shotting fireworks out the window while they had sex in the back of his car
Dude, I had to stop mid fuck. Her cat was swatting at my balls as I did her from behind. I couldve lost something.
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
Do we have to do this party tonight? I'm worried my bed will miss me...
I mean, I let him sleep with me after we both ate taco bell sober... That's kinda like love, right?
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
oh what is to come when my single life starts with a threesome?
Randomize
