I couldn't get internet on my iPod in this hotel room for porn, so I made due with UFC.
I'm not sure what to say to that.
i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
just upgraded from jello shots to jello bowls blacking out just got that much more delicious
He must hate going to the bathroom. Every time he does he is reminded how small his dick is.
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
Walking back from greek row alone at 3:30am in a child's kangaroo suit...not my proudest moment
some people offered us free beer as long as we shotgunned it and after you shotgunned four without pausing they took their offer back
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
when the song champagne showers came on you poured some kids beer over his head... while giving him a lap dance
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
I'm so poor. I just wiped my ass with cocktail napkins... That I stole from the neighbors... When I was over there stealing Cheetos.
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
Randomize
