Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
Found my little brother jerking off with a condom. he said he was "practicing"
OMG its one we used last night
Broke up w/ my married coworker...work is gonna get weird.
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
and my attempt at hiding my drunkness from my parents included walking into the wall as soon as they let me into the house.
He kept coming back from the bar with hotter girls and just left with two...I feel like I just witnessed something amaZing. Like meeting Jesus and finding out he has no morals either
Fun fact of the day: Our cat does not like rum.
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
Not only have I fallen off the wagon, it ran me over and just kept going...
I apologize for being mean. I love the blender and your vagina.
I should get him a card "thanks for letting me use you for your penis on and off as I see fit and for being a nice guy. My boobs and I appreciate your loyalty and dedication"
You know getting black out drunk at a cats birthday party should have been my lowest point drinking wise but some how I feel like last night was some how worse
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
Randomize
