Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
Just tried to tap morse code on the wall seperating our beds to tell you I was awake and ready to smoke
I just saw a guy in front of the courthouse giving himself a sobriety test and fail it...this can't end well
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
Front seat of an Escalade in a limo-service parking lot. That is all.
You'd think the dry cleaners next door would be less judgmental for as much business as my theme parties bring them.
I love my life sometimes. I do miss being an adult, from time to time, but a little vodka always changes my mind.
She tied her key to her bra the night before and couldn't get it off while trying to open the door this morning so she just took her bra off and let it tangle from the key while unlocking the door...the old Indian couple next door were shocked.
No judgement. Sometimes you gotta twerk on a legends face.
You said you were going to start drinking less. Drinking 25 small airplane bottle shots do not count.
dude, last night I won a real sword and a bottle of vodka in a cards against humanity tournament
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
Randomize
