I realized as I was wesiging my engamemby ring that you'd never love me tha same. I have life plans and Sam showed them to me
What? You're not speaking real words.
you scanned your fake to get into the dorm last night and when the lady told you it was the wrong card you looked at her and said this is who i am thursday night
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
thanks for paying me in special brownies...but brownies dont pay the rent...anymore.
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
Men are too sensitive. They need to learn to handle me.
My car insurance payment showed up today, so no inflatable hot tub for now. Sorry to disappoint.
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
THIS FUCKNUGGET
DOES HE EVEN REALIZE HOW MANY INCREDIBLE INSULTS I'VE WASTED ON HIM
I'VE INSULTED THE EVERLOVING SHIT OUT OF HIM AND HE CAN'T EVEN APPRECIATE IT
THE HO
We found him. He just came running out of the closet with a bruise on his face saying he has been fighting elves in Narnia for a year.
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