doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
I somehow fell asleep on my kitchen counter using the microwave as a pillow
we found you eating frozen orange juice with a spoon and then drinking vodka from the bottle.
i am too hungover to go to class can you just call me and put it on speaker phone
Holy mother of cocks. I was grind-with-my-boss drunk last night.
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
It's kind of like, standing in a garage and pretending you're a car. Except you're naked.
I said to him "i can't have sex with anyone in my friend's living room" then he said "we can move the air mattress into the kitchen"
Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!
I'm so lazy and tired i just want to cry and fall asleep in a bed of egg mcmuffins.
He is getting married. In the time it took for this conversation he probably cheated on her three times
I just got woken up by that guy wearing a Krispy Kreme hat giving out donuts
I love it when strippers help me get other strippers numbers.
I was pretty pissed in the morning when I realized he had fucked the fake tattoo right off my chest.
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