if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
You need to take one for the team and go bang a random sample of mexicans. Cause my internets broke and I can't google mexican foreskin stats.
He kept spanking me and talking about biomedical science.
Aw, you fucked a pre-med? you're moving up in the world!
No one figured out why I brought along the vibrating massager.
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
If you hit me with your dick and make light saber noises we are breaking up. I don't care if it's your birthday, you are not a sex Jedi.
So is singing the star wars theme as I put the condom on off limits?
Just saw 1 guy dressed as a cow and another dressed as a shrimp dancing on the side of the road. We're turning around I NEED to dance with them.
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
Your mother liked my album on facebook that's only filled with drunk pictures. I don't know what to feel about this
I've been asked to reupholster their slam-couch so I found some off-cuts of medical-grade, hermetically sealed fabric. She'll be slammed upon for generations to come.
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
Also, don't forget your plan to die young at a shrooms-fueled orgy.
I feel like my cat and I are playing mind games. I need more friends.
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
Randomize
