I have a feeling we are going to become cougars together.
Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
how drunk are you?
What does that even mean anymore?
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
it was like he was trying to blow his nose in my vagina
You tried to convince our cab driver that your $2 bill was worth $11.70
He told the cop he was underage, handed the cop his ID, and the police report read "I then informed the suspect that he was not, in fact, underage"
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
You should have seen her, she looked like a skinny Jabba The Hutt
That literally makes no sense
Exactly
Had sex and ran 2.8 miles all before 7:30am. This is going to be a very productive Monday.
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
Are you sexting with minion stickers right now?
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
Randomize
