First thing she said after sex was.. are you baptised by chance?
I just spent the last hour spooning with my drug dealer.
You drank almost the entire bottle of everclear and wanted to walk around. I guess your best friends sister is a cop and you wanted her to arrest you like the lil wayne song.... so sorry dude.
no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
the fire alarm went off. we werent sure whether to leave or turn the music up louder
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
He came over drunk in a speedo i told him he has my vote he said who are you voting for when i said obama he took off running and shouting i was worthless like an empty beer can
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
My mom just asked if I wanted a mimosa when I got out of the bath.
I think everything's gonna be okay.
You tryed convincing the salvation army bell ringer you could do the worm and face planted into the sidewalk... I put a dollar in the can for your performance
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