she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
I bought my dad an absinthe brewing kit for christmas.. looks like tripping with my dad is in my near future.
Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
Guy passed out in the lobby with a keychain sharpie hanging from his belt loop. 1 guest came in and wrote on him, then others saw and got in line. I'm not waking him up.
I sent him a pic of my tits.. All he said was, "oh your sun burn"
I'm slowing backing away from her. I tried breaking up with her and it felt like I was clubbing baby seals.
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
Remind me never to smoke before babysitting again. Ate an entire bottle of children's gummy vitamins.... not an easy thing to explain to parents.
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
You were so drunk last night that you fell thru the bathroom door at the bar, ripping it off the hinges in the process. But, your birthday tiara stayed on thru the whole thing. I'd call it a succcessful evening. Happy birthday kiddo!
she wouldnt leave because they were playing One Direction. I'm dating a thirteen year old.
Randomize
